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Parking Jagoffs

Peter Piper Picked A Peck Of Pictured “Peter Parkers!”

There have been sooooooooooooooooo many News JagsDriving Jags, Baseball Jags and Family Jags that we got backed up on “Peter Parkers.” So let’s run the table on a few.

Look at this one at the Sunoco on Route 65 in Bellevue…. a Double-Dutch “Peter Parker.”

Looks like BIG problems over in Bellevue…. Mr. “Red Solo Truck” needs his cigs in  hurry and we’re thinking the car on the right is a geometry teacher at Northgate High School.  Do ya see that perfect right-angle Jagoff #2 made with their car and the parking lines??  We’re staying away from this place cuz it’s only matter of time before someone bashes into the windshield washing fluid holder trying to wash bug guts off of their head lights.

Here’s one caught by a Pittsburgher in Olean, NY.  The message with the pic said, “New Yorkers always think they’re better than everyone else, apparently this Peter Parker is no exception.”

We have seen this before.  What is it with people in their sleeky, fancy-pants cars that makes them park diagonally to “assure” that nobody dings their doors?  Do they not realize that when people like US see this, it makes us want to run around randomly in the parking lot with a handful of keys sticking out from between our fingers… EDWARD KEYS-hands!!  We drive  “vette” too… it’s a CHEVETTE and we pretty much wouldn’t care if we parked it upside down near this car just to scare the S@# outta the other driver.

Then we have Rolls Royce in Maryland, with no placard parked in an “H” spot. 

The email with this pic ended with, “…. even though he displayed neither a disabled person license plate or a disabled person placard on his car. Apparently, this jagoff thinks protecting his expensive automobile is more important than the needs of the disabled.”  We agree here.. even though this person may, indeed, be handicapped, if ya don’t show it, ya don’t get the spot.  In the meantime, reading the words Rolls Royce made us think of that 80’s song “Car Wash” by the group ROSE ROYCE. 

(Car Wash!  Workin’ at the car wash yeah!)

There ya go, now that song is stuck in YOUR head too!!!!!!!

Ooh ooh! You might not ever get rich.

But let me tell ya it’s better than diggin’ a ditch.

There ain’t no tellin’ who you might meet.

 A movie star or maybe even an Indian chief.

(See? STUCK!)

Now on to this “Peter Parker.” 

Do ya think he was the FIRST one in the lot or the last one and took whatever he could get?  He was second!  Given that info, we’re glad this driver got that thing parked before everyone else go to the golf outing in South Park  cuz you have no clue how to park and, parking in a full lot would probably look a lot like an 8-year old at the Kennywood Park BUMPER CARS!

Finally, here’s a classic.  What do people think about when they’re parking?? Answer is:  Nothing but themselves!!

This came with the text, “… I ended up having to crawl through the back hatch to get into my car.”  So we have appropriately named this the “Weight Watchers Motivational Parking Method” cuz, in order to get in the car on the right, you have to spend 981 weeks at Weight Watchers OR be a pipe cleaner!!!  You can see a wife sliding in there, “Honey, does this Peter Parker make my butt look big?”

We’ve posted numerous parking Jagoffs so far.  We don’t seem to be having an affect on changing the bad behavior.  We are now going to appeal to parking line painters to stop with the uniform line placement and start painting random lines on the pavement of the lots.  Maybe THAT will get everyone “straightend out” YA Jagoffs!!!!!

Thanks to the following Honorary Jagoff Catchers for today’s blog post.

David Meyer

Patrick Mignogna

Joe Persico

Christina Abbott


Get your own printable Peter Parker notes to leave on these cars. 

Click the pic below to download.

  • SinBinKreations
  • North Country Brewing


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