What in theeeeeeeee hell are we all doing? Jagoff Parkers, other wise known as #PeterParkers still come in… multiple times per week> What are we all missing??????
We think the answer is COURTESY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Like at this guy.. he has that special rack on the back…. it looks pretty clean soooooooooooo wondering if he’s like those I.T. execs that buy hoopty-doo 4-wheel drive pick ups that are so decked out with chrome that they look like a parade wagon and never REALLY go four-wheeling….. only getting REAL dirt on them when they run over the horse droppings along the parade route!!!
Here’s the Facebook note that came with the pic:
as if it weren’t hard enough to get a parking place at Ikea on a Saturday you have people like this…
Oh wait!!! Maybe they put that PERTY LIL’ cage on the back so that they could load up with 5 or 6 Slurfingggibuker’s from IKEA. Of course we made that name up but so does IKEA!! And, it is our impression, that a Slurfingggibuket is probably an IKEA night stand or a full dining room set.. it just depends on how many of those cool screws and clips you purchase in aisle 3, bin #4.
And then we have MERCY, MERCY Mercedes….
Tons of spots all over but nope…. they have to park right on the line… not a care in the world. It came with a tweet that said,
You are an a$@!hole…
Well Mercy-Me.. you may indeed be one of those but you are also clearly a #PeterParker Parking Jagoff tooooo!!
Perhaps you needed this space to unload the kids’ combo-playstation-X-Box-Ninja-Turtle-StarWars-expandable-Lego-life-sized-bridge kits to take into the restaurant to occupy them during dinner so that they don’t bother anyone, OR YOU, during eating. Orrrrrrrrrr you coulda just parked correctly AND, correct your kids and make them actually sit still during dinner like our parents did!!!!!!
As you know, when it comes to posting people here we believe in “Don’t hate, EDUCATE!” But all of the potential education sessions we have offered seem to be ineffective.
The bottom line Mercy-Me and Hummer-Bird… we’re just going to pitch that all parking lots be installed with REVERSE GUILLOTINE’s along all of the parking lines. Basically, if your car is left parked over a line for more than 120 seconds… BOOM.. the REVERSE GUILLOTINE shoots up and cuts your car in half… long ways, cross ways…(if parked like the hummer over 4 spaces.. basically, the REVERSE GUILLOTINE slices and dices your car!!!!)
The message is pretty simply.. LEARN HOW TO PARK, Ya Jagoffs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Any of you have ideas for RE-education or punishment? leave a comment below.
Special thanks to @MikeDarnay, @mikeyp3258, and Sandie Mackintosh, (Facebook) for being Honorary Jagoff Catchers for today’s blog post!!!
Click the pic below to print of your very own Ya Jagoff Parking Tags.
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