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Ovechkin’s Hip Hop Gets Him 3 Games

As it says in our ABOUT page, we love Pittsburgh. And those posted on this website have either made the rest of us look bad OR have picked on one of us.  Given that, it’s actually hard to believe that we just didn’t start (aah never mind, we ALREADY get enough Russian SPAM in our comments feed.)

Be that as it may, above is the video (taped with our high-end FlipCam technology directly from our game-day TV while holding our FlipCam with one hand and eating homemade “stadium nachos” with the other) of the Penguins vs. Capitals game this past Sunday on NBC.  In the video, Ovechkin leaves his feet and jumps all up into the stuff of Penguins player Zbynek Michalek.

No penalty was called on this play during the game.  Apparently the referees were unable to see the 12″ gap between the bottom of Ovechkin’s skate blades and the ice surface as he smashed Michalek’s head against the glass with his forearm.

On the other hand, last week it came out that Ovechkin had also been involved in some other Hip-Hop activities…. a Russian Rap video.  A still picture is below and the REASON it’s only a STILL PHOTO is because seeing #8 trying to dance and rap is even MORE worthy of a fine than the hit on Michalek and probably worth a lifetime suspension from LIFE in general!

It’s clear that Ovechkin watches waaaaaaaaaay too much U.S. television and it appears to be the Nickelodeon channel!  Hell, Sid is delirious from a concussion and he hasn’t wondered THAT far outside of the margin!!!!

Going back to the hit on Zbynek Michalek, some would say, “Ovechkin is like the Pens Matt Cooke.  He’s dirty but we would love ’em if he played for the Penguins.”  We say, “Only IGNOR-amos’s like those that believed that the Steelers should have given Tommy Maddox a long-term contract believe that!” 

Point at hand, Ovy, we don’t like you.  We never will.  Even if you sang “Oh Danny Boy” at the grave of Art Rooney, Sr. while clenching a Terrible Towel and proclaimed that Bob Johnson was your master, we wouldn’t like you.

And to end this being TOTALLY superficial an paltry, the reason Pittsburghers REALLY don’t like you is that, you look like the offspring of a Pterodactyl and a triceratops, Ya Jagoff!


If you’re a rabid hockey fan, make sure you get your tickets to the Slapshot’s Hanson Brothers play with the Pittsburgh Celeberity Hockey Team on March 31st.

Featuring Cara Sapida As The EMS All-Star Team Coach

84 Lumber As the Presenting Sponsor

The Pittsburgh Celebrity Hockey Team


Olga Watkins Singing The National Anthem

Click the Pic for Tix! 




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OK, so this doesn’t REALLY fit our model of posting people trying to make Pittsburgh look bad but.. it feeeeeeeeeels REALLY good to write...