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SENIORS GIVE NEW MEANING TO ‘PARKING’ 

At Ya Jagoff, we strive to deliver jagoffery that happens right here in Pittsburgh more than nationally.  But sometimes, when something hits the epitome of what the WHAT, you have to address it.  Like senior citizens caught publicly meeting and having sex in a park.  

The gist of the story is this park was known for this “happening,” but there are just so many GLARING things about the particulars.  Let’s establish it is wrong no matter the area or the person(s), but if you are like me, by the time you are in your late teens the thought of even parents ‘doing it’ is enough to hit the vom-O-meter.  That age is only like forties!  These peeps were 62-85.  I mean I get that whole 50 is the new 30 scenario, so I guess 80 ish is the new sixty-something but come on.   

Remember the episode of Friends when Chandler was not allowed to make fun of his pals so he resorted to pointing out the obvious wrongs!  Ross walked into a room wearing leather pants and Chandler continues to point to the pants stating, Ross is wearing leather pants!  Kinda feel like that– these people are seniors! 

That takes care of the people part.  Now the place.  A park in Connecticut. I cannot imagine ONE location in Pittsburgh where this could become a thing.  I mean we have some nice parks and areas with picturesque atmospheres.  Heck, some of these serve as fantastic meet-up locations for newly dating couples or even a first date.  Okay, maybe sex even happened. But, to be recognized as the place to go have this happen? I mean, the Avalon Motel used to be the place where people of all ages and all walks of life met and ‘did it.’  Gross enough!  

But put the idea of old people doing it and in a public location together… just yikes.  I read the comments and some, as you can imagine, were humorous.  But the overall vibe is just ooh.  Get your game on seniors, but do it somewhere else than a public park.  The other major shock is it was ONE woman and five men….insert giant eye emoji! Hello—Ross is wearing leather pants a lot! Elephant in the room!  This is cray!   

The only take away I can redeem from this crazy Connecticut story is preserve your parks.  If you see any senior hanky panky starting, just stop it before it becomes an epidemic.  Be an upstanding citizen and stop the seniors from fornicating in public, ya jagoffs! 

 

 

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