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Selfie Stick Jagoffs

Selfie Stick Jagoffs?

Do you think we’re going to survive the selfie stick craze?

Quite possibly we will if we can come up with souvenir selfie sticks that replicate things like a retractable Duquesne Incline or our subway..(insert joke here about how the Pittsburgh Subway length would be actual size of a selfie stick).

But personally, I don’t think we are going to survive the selfie stick craze without a riot in some public place.

Smart phones have already gotten to the point that people know zero boundaries on how they invade on everyone else’s space…example, people that walk around airports with earbuds in each ear and over-modulate to the cohorts on the other end of the phone making us all suffer through their sales presentation recap conversation.

So now, selfie sticks will allow people to invade, however many inches they are in length, into our personal spaces.  You’re standing there on Mount Washington, trying to take your perfect selfie stick shot, while a family of 5 are trying to take their perfect selfie stick shot and then a minivan that has 14 family stick figures on the back window rolls in and wants THEIR perfect selfie stick pic.  Someone’s gonna “cross streams” and it will get UGLY.

Somewhere along the way, selfie sticks will probably even get longer and then invade the drone airspace while the drones are invading aircraft space and, eventually, we’ll maybe just have drone selfies.

I can even see a golf club… probably one of those drivers that look like a half of a bowling ball…that has a selfie stick bracket built inside of the head.

Worse yet, here comes summer.  Summer equals men in sleeveless shirts, some of whom don’t know that they should wear clear deodorant.  So, now we are going to be stuck with men in sleeveless shirts, taking selfies with selfie sticks, and we will be forced to look at their armpit hair matted with white deodorant stuff.

So, let’s just all agree… step away from the selfie sticks!  If we really and truly need them in our lives,  eventually, humans will adapt to the environment to the point that are arms evolve into being 36″ longer, Ya Jagoffs.



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