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Travel Jagoffs

“Just Sit Down Until The Door Opens!”

We all know, at this point, that traveling by airplane is no longer that fun, exciting way to travel any more.  As a matter of fact, it’s about as torturous as wearing a Pirates team jersey to a Braves game, in Atlanta, and cat-calling the Atlanta players then realizing you are seated in the Braves “Team Family Members” section and then having to ask the Braves Fan sitting next to you if they could spot you $10 for another beer!  Our worse, it could like flying in a USAirways plane.. oh wait.. um… nevermind.

But some things that make traveling by airplane  miserable, have been happening for a loooooooooooooooooong time.  This one is our favorite.

Just as soon as the pilot turns off the “Seatbelt” sign, you have those passengers that squeeze out of their window seat, grab their stuff out of the overhead compartment and then SIT or STAND right in the aisle while they wait for the airpline door to open.

Our point: Yes, the seatbelt sign IS indeed turned off.  But the airplane door to the outside is still closed, there’s no where for you to go!

Hey Mr. I-Have-to-be-The-first-person-off-Because-my-meeting-is-more-important-than-yours, yes, you may have to urinate.  Yes, you may have been sitting next to someone who hogged your armrest or who snored like a Midas Muffler commercial or who’s love-handles were touching your bare arm and yes, we ALL want to be the first one at the baggage claim (where we stand around forever anyway).

At Catholic Church Bingos, there is an unwritten bingo protocol essentially stipulating that, if you are new to playing bingo at the church, you risk your life by yelling “bingo” if you have it and yell it before you’re fully vested as a 5-year dobber-winning veteran.  And the 26-card playing gang members are not nice people to mess with.

Just like the Bingo Protocol,  There’s an unwwritten protocol for exiting a plane… HINT:  it’s like teaching your daughter how to wipe, FRONT TO BACK!!

Stay in your seats and out of the aisle and take your turn.  And while your waiting, DON’T pull out your cell phone and OVERMODULATE forcing us ALL to hear that you’re “in town” Ya Jagoffs!

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