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Check Out This Parking Job, 3 Spaces

yj-PeterParkers_Dunkin

Got this via our email submissions with the following note:

This jagoff decided to take up three spaces at a busy Dunkin Donuts!

Look, I’ve been in desperate need of a butter crunch doughnut.  I’ve even been in desperate need of purchasing a butter crunch doughnut so that I could pee without guilt.  (You know, how you run in to a place like Dunkin Donuts for an emergency pee so, as you walk directly to the rest room, you make positive eye contact with the counter person assuring them that, if you can just pee before your bladder explodes, you promise to NOT pee all over their floor and toilet seat AND you’ll be happy to buy a box of Munchkins that you don’t even want.)

But this?  Serious #PeterParkers stuff!  People don’t even park this poorly at that load-your-crap-while-your-holding-your-kid-or-hugging-your-honey IKEA loading area.

Clearly this is that kid from school, all grown up, who use to get 3 candy bars, lick all three, then asked if you want one.  Or, the same adult that sits sprawled across the couch during a football game despite the fact that all of the other seats are taken other than the broken beanbag chair.

All that I know is, thank God you didn’t go through the drive-thru lane! Your fenders would have never survived.

And with the current status of your spacial awareness skills, you probably would have been like those people that go to the drive-up ATM machine and ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS are either too far away and half to open their car door or, worse yet, CAN’T open your car door because your too CLOSE and your window’s broke, Ya Jagoffs

Thanks to Carrie T for being our Honorary Jagoffs Catcher

 

 

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