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Oh… This is Big-time Bicycle Jagoffery

Yep… you read that right.  He was playing traffic-manager, (just like the people who block you, in a highway construction zone, from getting to the merge point by driving down the middle of 2 lanes.)

This guy, David Smith, (must be his real name and NOT a fake she’s-not-my-wife-checking-into-this-hotel-with-me since he’s in court)  is charged in eight, yes 8, cases, dating back to 2012, of intentionally rode his bike in the middle of busy public roads with the intention to tie up the traffic behind him. He’s his very own morning rush-hour bulldozer! See full story on WTAE.com.

But wait.. it gets better:

Smith has been in jail since the summer of 2016. His bail was revoked after he ignored a court order not to ride his bike on public roads while awaiting trial.

Ol’ Davey has been in jail for a year about making a point with his bicycle in traffic?  Jeezuz.. he is more serious about being a “bicycle jagoff” than me when I was age 12, with balloons taped to my Huffy-bananna-seat frame to make a horrendous fake Cherry Bom Glasspack noise against the spokes and a thumb bell that I wrang incessantly as I wove in and out of traffic popping wheelies on Chartiers Avenue!

Dave, while I’m not a proponent of violence, I gotta tell ya.. no jury of my stuck-in-traffic-behind-an-ahole-bicycle-on-my-way-home-from-work peers would ever convict me if I told them what made me rub my bumper up against your back tire if you were purposely holding up traffic!

Quick question…. are you also the same person that I let cross in front of my car, as I’m driving through the local strip mall, that walks DIAGONAL and not perpendicular to the other side while they are texting, Ya Jagoff???

 

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