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Criminal Jagoffs

Dumb .. Like REALLY Dumb Counterfeiter

C’mon guy!  You can do better than this!

Summary.. guy (Richard Ferragonio, Jr) ALLEGEDLY was playing blackjack at the Rivers Casino with counterfeit $5 and $10 bills.  See Trib Story here.

Richy.. Richy… not-so-rich Richy!  You took counterfeit bills (allegedly) to a place that has more cameras and money-security-verifying-thingies than your local bank?  Don’t they have cameras on every angle except colonoscopy cameras (which may be coming soon?….I mean.. think of how willing 50+ year old guys would be to get checked if the camera just poked up through the slot-machine chair while they were playing the penny slots!)

Not-so-rich-especially-now Richy….here are a couple of cool future projects:

Go down to the Strip District and get some bricks from one of the old buildings… paint them gold.. not Aztec Gold like the Sister Bridges.. but “gold” gold and then take them into Fort Knox and redeem them for cash?

Or, even better, Fort Knox has gold “bullion” therefore, possibly get some chicken soup bouillon …it’s kind of yellow-ish… and you could possibly redeem THAT for cash with your MENSA-criminal buddies.

Even more realistically….next time use counterfeit bills with a Franco Harris or Jack Lambert face on them.  Sure, they may be obvious counterfeit but, if you get caught, you can simply say that they are priceless souvenirs and, even better, I guarantee some Pittsburghers will offer you REAL cash for those things, Ya Jagoff!