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Neighbor Jagoffs

Car Hokey Pokey With The Neighbor!

Have you ever gotten in your car, started to back out of the driveway and you only realize that there’s a bike or a bucket is back there when you actually hear a loud bang or dragging noise?  Imagine the noise that would come from THIS scenario.

This photo came on our Facebook page.  It was taken in West View, near the Highland Country Club.  Guessing that the neighbor forgot that he/she was no longer driving a smart car which, if you’re not familiar, is a roller skate with a gasoline engine.

But seriously, WHAT would make a neighbor park like this?  Ignorance, apathy, having to go to the bathroom REALLY, REALLY bad cuz the driver had a Sheetz hot dog 4.1 minutes prior?  (We’d give a pass on the Sheetz/bathroom… they should call those things SLIDERS cuz they give ya the SHEETZ!)

We sure hope this is an unfortunate mistake because we don’t want to see these neighbors on the news NEXT week with some kind of yard sign war.

Then again, we like our Hokey Pokey reference.  If you’re not familiar with the song, The Hokey Pokey, it’s a song played at every Pittsburgh wedding (in western PA, the ONLY way to truly consumate a marriage is to play this at your reception.)  It’s also usually played right around the same time as the Bird Dance!!  And both of these dances are the songs that finally get your drunk uncle on to the dance floor and convinces him that he can actually dance!!!  These songs are usually followed by the Electric Slide which is where your drunk uncle figures out he actually CANNOT dance.. and he ends up hip checking Auntie Eileen into the bridal table Brooks Orpik style!

Back to the photo of the Hokey-Pokey-Hokey-Driver, how about Gettting-off-your-phone-or-Stop-yakking-with-your-passengers-or-Being-so-self-absorbed-with-your-hairdo and focusing on PARKING the next time you park in the alley.  For crissakes, we haven’t seen that much back-end sticking out since Chaka Khan retired, Ya Jagoff!!!

Special thanks to Facebook follwer Tom Link for being our Honorary Jagoff Catcher today!


Win a signed copy of this brand new book from Pittsburgh Comedian John Knight.

Click the pic below for deets!!!



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