Weather Related Jagoffs

Oct 13 2011

It’s Raining, It’s Pouring…. SO LET’S PANIC!!!!!!!

While our contract with all of you only requires us to post on Monday, Wednesday’s and Friday’s, this post just HAD to be made.  And made ASAP!!!

Yesterday it rained.  Rained some more and then it rained more.

Yesterday, IN THAT RAIN, I spent more time behind the steering wheel then most cab drivers and the Made-U-Look advertising trucks combined.  (This includes the wasted miles, in the rain and traffic, up Route 28 to Etna for the Scarehouse Crazy Scary event THAT ISN’T UNTIL NEXT WEDNESDAY.  It also includes the TOTALLY-TICKED-OFF-AT-MYSELF wasted miles on scary Route 28 in the rain and traffic GOING BACK HOME from Etna after actually READING THE DATE PRINTED ON THE TICKET …. October 19th)

Yep, I’m a Why-didnt-you-read-the-ticket-before-you-left-the-house-Jagoff!

Back to the rain, we don’t know what happened to everyone’s driving skills over the summer but, what we DO know, there aren’t many people around here that are ready to drive in the sleet, freezing rain and snow of the upcoming winter.  To put this in Steelers terms, our first pre-season game before the winter driving season revealed a lot of WHOLES in our ability to execute—the standard is NOT the standard at this point i.e, 25 mph in a 40mph area just cause it’s raining IS NOT THE STANDARD!!!!

One of our Facebook followers summed it up perfectly with two posts on her wall yesterday.

As per Funk and Wagnall’s official definition, “road rage” was originally spotted on a rainy Wednesday morning in Pittsburgh…..just sayin’…..

Then she said,  “It’s RAIN Pittsburgh……..NOT snow and ice, Ya Jagoffs!!!!!!”

Author’s Note: We took the liberty of adding our tag line to her second quote. :)

 

THANKS TO OUR HONORARY FACEBOOK FOLLWER THERESA METELSKY FOR LETTING US USE HER QUOTE!!!

 

If you want tickets to the Crazy Scary event NEXT WEDNESDAY at Scarehouse, which benefits

Make Room for Kids and Christmas Crazy for Kids,

click HERE!

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By Jagoff Catcher • Driving Jagoffs, Weather Related Jagoffs • 1 • Tags: ,

Feb 23 2011

Snow Removal Jagoffs

I have to admit, I was close to posting this as I was driving up West Carson Street yesterdat over top fairly deep snow tracks.  But then, I decided, “Oh, hell!  This one’s toooooo easy.  It’s like tellin’ a “dick joke” for an easy laugh.  I thought SO MUCH about NOT posting this that I chose to NOT have Mrs. Jagoff Catcher snap an iPhone photo!

Theeeeeeeeeeeen, I received a tweet sayin’ “Jagoff of the day suggestion. Director of Public Works who still hasn’t learned how to plow a road in Pittsburgh.”  That’s IT!! DONE DEAL!! Pushed me over the edge so here it is.

          *  Sunday Evening: Jon Burnett says might be snowy Monday evening into Tuesday

          *  Monday AM:  Mike LaPoint says there’s some snow coming later today/evening

          *  Monday Noon: Demitrius Ivory says there’s some snow comin’ and it might be more than a handful (Paraphrasing)

          *  Monday Afternoon: Snow starts to pile up faster than BS out of City Council chambers

          *  Monday 10pm News: Julie Bologna says snow to stop before midnight (hint: 7 hours BEFORE morning rush hour)

          *  Tuesday, 2pm(ish): WPXI website says residents PLEASED with snow removal effort

WHAAAAT???  I get the whole “salt can only do so much” and “we were out all night with everything we have” stuff but…

Me, the trucks that jack-knifed this morning and the cars that spun out weren’t on PACKED SNOW.  We were drivin’ PRIMARY ROADS on snow that looked like the end of the Boyce Park bunny hill after 120 kids snow-plowed down the first time.  Mr. Kaczorowski, engineers figured out how to turn an entire  ”smokey city” into one of the “greenest cities” but reasonable snow removal still seems to elude you, YA JAGOFF!!! 

(Of course, the Boyce Park bunny hill note is PURELY conjecture sinc the only way down that hill THIS SEASON is by Fire Department ladders and ropes!)

THANKS TO @Len_Brennan for the “push” and for being an EXCELLENT Honorary Jagoff Catcher!

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By Jagoff Catcher • Travel Jagoffs, Weather Related Jagoffs • 0 • Tags: ,