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Driving Jagoffs

Discount Mattress Delivery???

When you get a “discounted” mattress, I guess it stands to a reason that you probably don’t have the extra $35 to pay to have said mattress delivered.

The the tweet that came in with this photo yesterday.. yesssssssss, yesterday, this is Breaking Jagoff News!!!  And it got the full royal treatment including the Jagoff-estrator!  Anyway, here’s the tweet:

@YaJagoff C’mon seriously!!! The 18 Wheeler behind him is NOT seeing the humor in this

Yeah.. me thinks the 18-wheeler, driving behind this guy on I-79, is potentially looking at a completely different idea of a SLEEPER CAB if that thing blows off.  And, since the car underneath is the size of a tricycle, it potentially could all just fly backwards into the oncoming truck’s windshield!!

This scenario kind of flies in the face… (like how I just did that?) of the Subaru slogan, “Confidence in Motion.”  Nothing about a mattress flopping up and down at 60 mph exudes confidence in motion.

Wait… maybe we are all being punked and this is a Subaru commercial to show how fuel efficient the cars are even WITH a mattress acting as a 45-degree wind-wedge!  What’s the over and under on 4 miles per gallon?

Do the Subarus now come with an external roof-top airbag in case of sudden rollovers and this one accidentally deployed?

NOPE!

I mean REALLY….what was this person thinking???  Everyone knows that you’re supposed to put your left arm out the window and grab the mattress with your finger tips until they or raw in order to safely stabilize a humongous mattress to the top of a pint-sized car that is driving 55-65 mph on a highway according to OSHA standards!

Dude, face it, you’re driving a Subaru.. you should be sleeping on an AIR mattresses and sleeping bags, not real mattresses.  (Yeah, I just stereotyped there and it probably wasn’t fair.)

You pay to have pizza delivered!   For crissakes, pay the extra few bucks and get the thing, that you’re going to sleep on the next 10 years, delivered so we’re all not having to leave as much space behind you on the I-79 as we do for the old guy who farts in the Walmart check-out line, Ya Jagoff!

You can see previous mattress/furniture moving genius pics here.

 

Thanks to @Steveliv708 for being our Honorary Jagoff Catcher!!

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