Hey!! Do You Have A Listening Problem??

Traveling by airplane is just no fun any more. Too many games like:

Playing the baggage check-or-no-check game with the ramp attendant.

Playing the waiting game to see if a flight crew member is going to snap BEFORE you turn your phone off so that you can be famous in Twitter.

Waiting for the passenger in the security line who, despite knowing they were getting on an airplane, chose to wear 3 fashion belts, 14 metal bracelets on the left wrist and watches for 3 different time zones on the right wrist and shin-high laced boots.

One long standing rule: For some crazy reason, on take-off and landing, your seat has to be upright. Which, in my section is about a 4″ difference in comfort.

So why did subject #1  have to be told 3 times to put her seat-back up? One as we where taxi-ing, to the runway.  Does she REALLY not know the routine?

And why does subject #2 have to be told 3 times to put his seat-back in the upright position? And why act like you have two brain cells by saying, “huh?” when reminded the 3rd time?

Whether or not these rules make sense is not for us to decide. The fact is, the rules are the rules and, take-off time is not the time to perform your silly little protest by acting like you’re brain dead or a spoiled brat.

You should not expect the flight attendant to be like your mommy and give you multiple warnings (I’m gonna count to 10 and you better listen..) before you have to follow the rules like everyone else (8….9….9 and a half, 9 and three quarters, 9 and seven-eights…)

If this is the way flying continues to progress, I totally support the flight attendants’ being given the authority to perform Sister-Mary-Mengela-type-Back-of-the-neck-hair-twists-And-earlobe-pulls-Or-Back-of-the-skull-open-handed-slaps to make people, like you, follow the rules Ya Jagoffs!!!


What to do With All of those Old Sports Thingies


Collect all of those old sports items…. mitts, balls, pucks, sticks, bats, elbow pads, helmets.  This is a competition that only lasts until the end of the month.  Take all of the items to the Monroeville Mall Food Court.

See video:

We cannot let St. Louis win!

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How To Impress Your Boss


First, my apologies to WPXI reporter, Jennifer Tomazic, for the horrible facial expression screen capture.

Second, I don’t care what side of this thing you’re on… whether or not you think McD’s workers deserve $15/hour or not but, I gotta tell ya, I’m kind of a practical guy and, how I see this is, the way to NOT get $15/hour or ANY $/hour is to get arrested.  Let alone, arrested in your work uniform.

Be careful, good decision-making skills might be a on the check-off list to get hired/a raise, Ya Jagoffs!