The Phonebook Litterbugs

 

This is a picture of the “Yellow Pages” or “Super Pages” or Yellow Book” or “Super Yellow Duper Book” or whatever they call that thing people used to use to find phone numbers of companies they want to contact.  I’m actually not sure who the Jagoffs here are…. the people convincing companies that SOMEONE really reads thru this thing looking for their phone number in some highlighted two-color ad OR the companies who PURCHASE ads believing that SOMEONE actually really does read thru this thing looking for their company’s phone number.

Either way, these books are all over the ground in the neighborhood and, unless they make good mulch (they don’t), these books are about as useless as these other items:

1) Car Burglar Alarms – Nobody even looks when these go off anymore, they take pictures of the car and turn them into us as Jagoff posts.

2) House Phones – The only reason it’s still on the wall is because we have nothing else to plug into that goofy-shaped outlet.

3) My Popeil Pocket Fisherman – If any of you remember it, you know why it’s useless

4) My Battle Ship Game cuz I’ve lost most of the red pegs anyway and the aircraft carrier lost some pegs so it spins and people can cheat

5) An actual SCRABBLE game – everyone has the APP version.

6) That green fuzzy thing in the back, bottom of your refrigerator that you can’t identify – unless it’s a St. Patrick’s Day ZAGNUT bar!

7) A Trivial Pursuit game (unless you make a NO-SMART-PHONE rule)

Hey Super Pages… wondering if mine was actually the “white pages” but, because it sat so long before I stooped over to pic it up, the neighborhood dogs did a few leg-lift-performances on them and NOW they are “Yellow Pages!”  Have you not heard of things called “websites” and “google and yahoo” searches and, now in 2014 these things called “Face” books?????

I say, God bless ya for being able to “A.J. Richardson I don’t know where the calls for 911 are coming from” (my term for BS’ing) companies into purchasing ads and making a buck somehow.   But in my case, I’m REALLY glad the thing comes prepackaged in its own garbage bags, Ya Jagoffs!

 

Pirate Fan Catches Ball in Bucket of Popcorn

YJ-Popcorn

Just in case you missed this in the Pirates game last night, the dude catches a ball in his popcorn bucket.  Watch out for exploding popcorn! Nice catch kid!!

Watch the video below

 

Can Changing Your Car’s Oil Be That Difficult?

YJ-OilChange

I have to admit, when it comes to car maintenance, I’m a Jagoff… maybe even approaching the moron level.  Basically, when it comes to car maintenance, I am lucky that I know the difference between where the air in the tire goes and the gas for the engine.  But,  under the auspices of trying to save money and learn something new, I have been trying to learn how to do more things on my car.  For example, I have been practicing changing the oil in my car.

And I’m getting really decent at it too. I have it now down to where it only takes me about 4 hours to change the oil on my car.

The problem is, the cars need to be better designed… I mean.. it takes so long to drain the old oil out!

You have that dipstick thingy, right?  You pull that out, look at it and wipe it off.  You put it back in, you pull it back out and you wipe it off.  You put it back in, pull it out again and you wipe it off…. again and again and again.  It takes damn near FOREVER to get rid of the old oil!

I’m wasting a ton of time on this, Ya Jagoffs!