Computer Jagoffs

Windows? WINDOWS! Wiiiiiiindows!!


So I was REAL close to writing a posting about those dumb commercials where everyone keeps saying “windows.”  In the meantime, there I was writing some stuff at the local “coffee-shop-where-I-drink-hot-chocolate-cuz-I-don’t-like-coffee-but-want-to-look-like-a-big-boy” shop.  As usual, I pushed my time to the max because, as one friend used to say, “laptops and PowerPoint have brought procrastination to a whole new level.”

OK, time to run and drive like a Jagoff to get to the next meeting.  Time to shut down the laptop.  Then I see the screen above.

“Please do not power off or unplug your machine.  Installing update 1 of 24.”

THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I NEEDED RIGHT NOW!!!!  And then it takes 17 minutes to complete.

OK, Bill Gates Kool-Aid drinkers,  the next time I need an update to my “Macro-.dll-DMAK-GDI-Net BEUI-.mxp-WFW 3.11-WEW-.PSD-.xml-WYSISYG-VXB-.vga-URL-.SDK-LMNOP-EIEIO-WTF syntax” files, how about a little warning and a choice to say “Not right now I have a million @#$@# things to do” YA JAGOFF!!!

Talkin’ Password Jagoffs

Today we have a guest blog post form Elista B of “100.7 Star”

You can listen to her from 7pm-Midnight

Just when you finally remember that password to an account… “POP Reminder” time to change the password! WHAT? I just wrote that one down on the back of a cereal box and now I need to remember a new one? Are you kidding me?

Then you go to try to track your old password down because you forgot it and this fuzzy screen pops up!

Now you gotta decipher whatever is in that shady 3D box of doom.

Am I the only one who cannot read these? I have 20/20 vision and STILL cannot correctly “Guess what’s in the box!”

This is not a guessing game. I can’t remember my password now ******* give it to me!

Rant over.

Jagoff Catcher Note:  Our ending so that Elista doesn’t get in trouble… “This is not a guessing game. I can’t remember my password now ******* give it to me, Ya jagoff!!”

You can follow Elista on Twitter and all of her “100.7”  Star blog posts HERE

Don’t Forget To Order Your  Own T-shirt

Click the pic below to see the store.



Soooo What Does That Apple Agreement Say??

Finally it’s come to this.  We like our iPhones.

As a matter of fact, when everyone was buying iPhones when they first came out, and justifying to themselves, “I need an iPhone because….”  WE openly admitted, we just wanted one because they were “cool.”

So we have had this thing and every few months we download an app or song and SUDDENLY there’s another new “agreement.”

1) Does anyone actually read these?  If yes, are you the same people that pay attention when a car alarm goes off?

2) What does it say?  Is it the same stuff that we slept through in high school trigonometry class or does page 31-62 just spell out what Charlie Brown’s teacher used to say, “Waa..wa… Waaaaa…wa..wa..waaaaa….waaaaa..wa…wa…waaaa.”

Who knows?

We simply click “OK” or “AGREE” which can BASICALLY  be interpreted as, “I just want to down load this @#$@# app so I’m going to click your pain-in-the-!@#!@ Jagoff button so that I can get it despite the fact that somewhere on page 12 it says I owe you 2 children by the year 2034 and that they must become Apple programmers, and page 19 says that we swear to never purchase anything from Bill Gates or anything referring to GATES including the new gates on our cyclone fence and page 31 states that, if anyone at Apple sings karaoke at a bar, I must download an MP3 file of it at a fee of $1.99 and on page 59 it says that I must have an iPhone chip surgically inserted into the back of my neck like they do to cats at the Humane Society and then on pge 61, paragraph 7, subsection 8a it says that, if I ever throw my iPhone at the ground or a wall, that chip can be activated to provide a lethal shock to my heart” Ya Jagoffs!!!!!

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