Commercials

Don’t Know Why, But This Bothers Me

YJ-Shorkey

I listen to the local radio allot. Some times I get crazy and turn up the bass, roll the windows down, lean into the center and blast a good AM radio talk show.  Basically,  I ain’t paying to listen to all the credit card  debt commercials on satellite radio!

Anyway, I hear the Jim Shorkey and Katie Shorkey auto dealership commercials.   The commercials are standard stuff, a caffiene-loaded announcer gets on and says “WOW-WIZBANG-WOW” kind of stuff and then asks about the weekly “Outta-this-world-No-other-dealership-could-be-less” kind of deals that are goin’ on.

Enter Jim and Katie Shorkey – ON THE PHONE!!!!

Whaaaaat?  You pay thousands of dollars for air-time, another thousand for professional voice and then I have to listen to you tell me about great deals over the PHONE????  At home, do ya record your favorite MP3 files over to cassette tapes before ya jam???

Shorkey’s, yer a great family in the area and we appreciate what you do in the community.  I offer one VERY UNIQUE MARKETING CONCEPT.

You sell cars.  So how about jumpin’ into one of ‘em and driving to the studio to record yer commercials, YA JAGOFFS!

(Second choice – fire the JAGOFFS that tell you that this is good marketing for your company!!  And please don’t hire the ones that tell ya its a good idea to YELL!)

Am I being to picky here???  Let me know if I’m the Jagoff below.

Everyone In The Heinz Commercial Is Doing It Wrong

YJ-Heinz

Today’s post originally appeared on the blog,  Sean’s Ramblings Blog.  It is a PERFECT Guest blog post!

Watch the Heinz Ketchup Commercial from the Super Bowl.  No REALLY.. watch it!

Am I the only one who notices something wrong with the commercial? Everyone in the commercial hits the bottom of the bottle to get the ketchup out. Growing up in Pittsburgh, I learned at a young age the proper way to effectively get ketchup out of a Heinz bottle. You tap the 57. This might have been part of the first grade curriculum. Heinz even writes this !

What’s the best way to get Heinz ketchup out of the iconic glass bottle?

To release ketchup faster from the glass bottle, apply a firm tap to the sweet spot on the neck of the bottle— the “57.” Only 11% of people know this secret. Now you’re “in-the-know.”

While Heinz may have spent $4 million on the TV spot, perhaps they should have spent the $0 to tell the marketing people the right way to get ketchup out of the bottle… YA JAGOFFS!

(I added the little Ya Jagoff thingy!)

 

Thanks to Sean for offering to re-post his blog post here.  Follow him on his website and on Twitter @SeansRamblings.

How Primanti’s Should Battle New Burger King FRY BURGER!

YJ-PrimantisKing

 

 

Yesterday it hit the news!  Burger King is adding french fries to their hamburgers.    And it looks like this.  (see full story from WPXI here)

Photo courtesy of The Associated Press

Photo courtesy of The Associated Press

Now, we all know of some local restaurant that has taken liberties with their own version of fries and cole slaw on a sandwich.. calling it the Pittsburgh Sandwich, the Pittsburgher, the Yinzer and on and on and on and on and on.. (wow… just fell asleep bored writing that).  And while I don’t think that fries on the burger is really a thing about following the Primanti’s lead, I think it’s more about feeding college kids who learned, long ago, that it is AWESOME to put your fries on your burger.   Quite frankly, I think Burger King fries are some of the WORST fast food fries and I see this as a manner to use up their french fry inventory.    You don’t see McDonald’s trying to hide THEIR fries on anything!!

And while we’re at it, when is the last time you saw french fries at Burger King that looked like fresh-cut 2 x 4’s out of the lumber aisle at Lowe’s?

The Primanti’s response to the French Fry Burger was awesome… they tweeted a photo of one of THEIR sandwiches stacked so tall that UPMC almost called them to ask if they could mount letters on it.  And this was the wording on the tweet:

It’s cute that they’re trying, but here’s what a real (the original) sandwich w fries on it looks like

What if Primanti’s took the NEXT step and hired that creepy, over-sized head, currently unemployed Burger King to sell THEIR sandwiches???  Sure, it would be deja vu creepy if you saw him hanging around one of the suburban Primanti’s locations or the original store in the Strip District during normal hours.  But, after 11pm on a Friday or Saturday night, he would hardly be noticed and, might even become more revered than the Pie Man!

But let’s go YINZER and get all up in the grill of Burger King… (see what I did there.. GRILL?) cuz that’s what we do here in Pittsburgh!!

Burger King, you’re like the Avis of fast food.. trying harder but ALWAYS second to someone!!!  Get your measly-little-four-french-fry-bun-only-looks-this-good-in-advertising-photos-cause-its-usually-smashed-by-some-teenager-cook-that-hates-their-job French Fry Burger outta our house, Ya Jagoffs!