Some Hawaiian Jagoffery To Warm Us Up


After a couple of days of nasty weather, I thought it might be worth posting a little sunshine.  Hawaiian sunshine with a little bit of Jagoffery.

Not much to say  that the photo doesn’t.  Below is what the Instagram message said:

guess this guy didn’t want to bother with a tarp.. yes, that is a lawn mower hanging out of the back..

I utilized the “Jay Caulfield Approved Jagoffestrator” to highlight the lawn mower.  You’re welcome!

But wait!  Maybe we are all being too judgmental.  Remember those urban legend stories about  a dead scuba diver being found at a forest fire?  Supposedly the body was fully clad in a wetsuit complete with scuba tanks and mask and the story is told that a scuba diver was accidentally scooped up in an air tanker with a load of water from the local ocean/lake.

We put the SJU (Special Jagoffs Unit) on this task and, their premise was, POTENTIALLY, there was an over-sized bull dozer, digging at a major site, that somehow scooped up an unsuspecting grass cutter who was mowing some big weeds along the side of a Hawaiian Highway, accidentally scooped up and dumped into the back of this pickup truck.  Where his body is, we are not sure.  Perhaps he/she is napping in the back of the truck OR perhaps he/she has gone off to scuba dive and, potentially at risk of getting  picked up by a helicopter and thrown on top of a forest fire.

Or maybe this is a mobile landscaping exhibit where they are trying to show you that new kind of lawn mower than can cut your hillside conveniently!

Other than that, there seems to be ZERO explanation for this.  My guess is this truck doesn’t need a “Keep Back 500 Feet” sign since, I’m fairly certain there’s nobody tail-gating him with that precariously placed mower.  Hey Fred Sanford, Jr, Jr, Jr, (yes, a distant relative) you might be able to stop working so hard for a living.  Do this: enter that lawn mower into the cirque du soleil performances, it’s balancing ability is incredible and you’ll get RICH other than SUED when that thing falls off your truck, Ya Jagoff!


Mahalo to @Libbunnie on Twitter and Instagram for submitting this pic and being our Honorary Jagoff Catcher.

Gun Goes Off at Giant Eagle. What’s the REAL Crime?


This excerpt from Mike Hasche at the Trib (WPXI News Partner) kind of says it all:

Two people suffered superficial wounds from what appeared to be pieces of ceramic tile when a gun accidentally discharged as it hit the floor of a Giant Eagle in Richland.

The owner of the gun, who was “very upset and apologetic to the victims,” was charged with simple assault and reckless endangerment, a criminal complaint states.

Mike’s Full Story     WPXI Story

This story had a good ending, THANKFULLY, in that nobody was injured and no animals were tortured for the story.  That, leaves it open for posting here as jagoffery.

So, let us start the debate right here, right now!  Let’s get REAL!  Do guns kill people or do people with guns kill people?

Wait! No, that’s not right.

The REAL debate here is, “Should  a Man (or anyone for that matter) Wear a Fanny Pack?

I mean, MAYBE if you needed something (back in the 1980s) to put your Kennywood ride tickets in, or your rolled up dollar bills that you specifically saved for Potato Patch Fries, chap stick, neosporin, bandaids and your Nokia flip phone, (you know, the phone where the only game on it was SNAKE).  Other than being at a retro Halloween party and or having a disability that requires you to have one, we can find no reason, that is not criminal, to be seen wearing a fanny pack.  I mean, get yourself a back pack and carry on one shoulder for cryin’ aht lahd!

Hey Fanny-pack Fred, yes, you should have been more responsible at securing your properly permitted weapon, but GEEZ…why do you even have a gun?  Nobody wants to steal your neosporin, bandaids OR your FANNY PACK, Ya Jagoff!


You can order the book by clicking on it below.

Above the Fries_Cover2


Last night, after midnight, we put all of the names from this past weekend’s blog post, into my STANKY old Pens cap aaaaaand the winner of the 4 shot glasses from this past weekend’s blog post is Rachael Ane.

Rachel, email us at YaJagoff (at) Verizon (dot) net, subject line SHOT GLASSES and give us your address.



Taking the Word Jagoff Forward


It’s been a pretty fun week.  Two things happened, completely separate from each other, as far as planning, but worked out kind of cool.

Yesterday, I received the above pic from our buds at Eyetique on Instagram with the following message:

#EyeSpy our favorite jagoff, @yajagoff in the newest issue of @whirl magazine! #SEELocal #Pittsburgh#NCEyewear #Eyetique

It’s a photo of the most recent Eyetique ad, in their series of “-ique” ads featuring various Pittsburghers.  The campaign has been going on for years.  This specific ad is in the most recent Whirl Magazine issue.  It’s pretty damned cool to see that and I couldn’t be more appreciative of all of the support Norman Childs and his gang have given this blog.

As you know, Eyetique and 3 Guys Optical were very supportive of our dictionary project making a sizable donation to the Pittsburgh Emergency Medicine Foundation. Be sure to tweet, email, Instagram or Facebook a message to Norman and the gang and let them know how cool they are!

The other thing that happened this week was getting a chance to be on the KDKA Pittsburgh Today Live TV show to talk about my book, “Above the Fries.”  If by chance you live out of town and hadn’t seen the interview it is below.

If by chance you live near my parents, make sure you let them know that you were happy to see that I put on a sport coat for the TV interview!

Let me just say this….none of this is possible without you all following the blog each day, each week, occasionally or even if you only read it when your in-laws come to town and you say you’re “doing some extra stuff for work this weekend.

So thanks to you all!

I’ll do my best to keep up.

Thanks much, Ya Jagoffs (said in the term of endearment manner)

You can order the book by clicking on it below.

Above the Fries_Cover2


You can win a set of 4 YaJagoff shot glasses by making a comment below before Sunday,1/25 at 11:59pm.