Let’s do the old MasterCard commercial:
COST OF STAYING IN THE CHARLOTTE DOUBLETREE: $143/NIGHT
COST OF DINNER AT THE CHARLOTTE DOUBLETREE: $10/HAMBURGER
COST OF PARKING AT THE CHARLOTTE DOUBLETREE: KIND OF FORGET BUT, AROUND $10/DAY
COST OF ME, SITTING IN THE PARKING LOT OF A CHEAPER HOTEL, EATING MY DOUBLETREE CHOCOLATE-CHIP COOKIE, SIPPING ON MY FREE DOUBLETREE COFFEE AND STEALING THE CHEAPER HOTEL’S FREE INTERNET: PRICELESS!!!
Hey DUB-TREE… the fact that you give me extra warm chocolate-chip cookies upon check-in, a free razor if I forgot one, free toothpaste if I forget some, a free comb if I needed one (I don’t), a free USA Today – which nobody ever reads, free soap, shampoo and hair conditioner, free electricity, free water – despite the fact that I run the HOT WATER for 45-minutes to “shower iron” my clothes after traveling coupled with the fact that your wireless internet access is simply floating in the air and not a soul has to do ANYTHING to provide me access to it, do you REALLY have to charge $9.95 to use the internet, Ya Jagoffs??????
Rachael Rennebeck is a Pittsburgh jagoff (the term of endearment version of jagoff of course) who cofounded YaJagoff Media, LLC. With decades of experience eating, drinking, shopping, living, and being among yinzers, we birthed the Pittsburgh-centric company encompassing all things related to the 412, oh, and the 724.
