Perhaps the closest U-Haul location was flooded by the recent rain. That has to be it! Let’s hope that a phone call was made to the U-Haul location to arrange for a rental and boo, the rain has flooded the fleet prohibiting the rental process. Or maybe the delivery fee was some ungodly, astronomical amount that maybe, just maybe, was hiked up for some pre-fall or late summer sale that will launch days later to make the absorbent delivery fee not seem so horrid. A final possibility is that the friend, cousin, brother-in-law, neighbor and old college roommate, called upon for this move, was just ridiculously busy with that ‘thing’ he had going on instead of carting this item appropriately in a truck. At any rate, this should not happen and it immediately prompted this recognizable rhyme:
This item cannot, and will not, fit like a pair of college jeans,
No matter how you squeeze, nope, not by any means.
You did not transport with a truck,
so see the item just got stuck.
A U-haul was a no go, too,
so what did this silly jagoff do?
Didn’t ask a friend or pal,
didn’t ask a soul at all.
Through a window, it was shoved and crammed,
haphazardly positioned and awkwardly jammed.
So all passersby can do, is point and shake their heads,
Ya jagoff, you should have thought it through and maybe planned ahead!
Thanks to @BurgherMan for being today’s Honorary Jagoff Catcher.
Rachael Rennebeck is a Pittsburgh jagoff (the term of endearment version of jagoff of course) who cofounded YaJagoff Media, LLC. With decades of experience eating, drinking, shopping, living, and being among yinzers, we birthed the Pittsburgh-centric company encompassing all things related to the 412, oh, and the 724.
