What is Leg-Lamp Night on Christmas?

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Last week we invited yinz to submit your Holiday Story traditions.  

Mary MacAnellen our buddy from the MaryMac Bakehouse submitted this story.  Hope you enjoy it. Feel free to SHARE.

We will be back to Jagoff Catchin’ Monday.

We live in the middle of No Where. Seriously. Our house is on a hill in the wind. Farmed fields are across the road from us and stretch on for a long way. We can see the weather coming when it’s hours away. We always have wind. Always. I’m talking kite flying, hat blowing off, bone chilling wind.

We put an addition on our house that included a front porch with the idea that we could have Christmas Lights. You know what wind does to Christmas Lights? It blows the bulbs right out of the sockets! Wreaths? Ha! They wind up in the woods! Garland? Rips the tinsel right out of the rope!Bows?

They spin around like pinwheels!  We were left with no decorations for Christmas.

Then, one day, I came upon a full sized Red Rider Leg Lamp! It’s the real deal, just like the major award from the movie! It arrived 8 years ago and has been in our front window ever since. Now, from it’s protected location in the living room window, the soft glow of electric sex can be seen by the very few passers-by who travel our road. We use it as a beacon to guide guests to our house “Just look for the Leg Lamp in the window!” we say.

And every year, on the first day of December, we celebrate Leg Lamp Light Up Night, when the Lamp is officially turned on to start the Christmas Season.

Click on “Mary’s Buns” to find out where to get them.

marymacBuns

Yakkin’ With Ya Jagoff! – Wigle Whiskey

A Wednesday “Yakkin’ With Ya Jagoff!” episode!

A little secret: This is a re-run for the Holiday

We are yakkin with Meredith Grelli, one of the owners of Pittsburgh’s only whiskey distillery!

Do we get to taste test?  Yeeeees we do!

Pittsburgh was once known for whiskey MORE than football!

Who in the heck was John Wigle?

How a family drinking thing  led to them making whiskey!

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Follow Wigle Whiskey on their website.

THANKS TO:

For the production!

How Toilet Paper Tracks to Thief (Not DNA)

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Yeah… but the linkage via the toilet paper was not how you might suspect like DNA or stuck to the heel of his shoe.

Details are: (See full WTAE Story)

29 year old Eric Frey ALLEGEDLY hands the pizza guy a note announcing his intentions of wanting $300 and that he had a gun.

Eric Frey gets caught by police still in the pizza shop because they’re fast to respond to a panic button notification.. well, faster than the pizza shop person was at reading Eric’s note on the toilet paper.

Eric has the perfect alibi, “______ made me do it!”  Maybe a large, bearded man.  Which is probably less frightening then a large, bearded woman.

The problem is, ya know when you write with a pen on something soft, how the impression bleeds through? Well, guess what the police found on the E-man’s TP at home?

HINT: It was not the winter emergency shopping list of  more toilet paper, milk and bread.  But the total of cash needed was right on target, $300!

E-man, (calling ya that cuz we feel like we could be buds) too bad you didn’t go to Catholic grade school with me and take Sister Lucy’s hand-writing class.  The police would have never been able to track ya because, in her writing class, she would pull the short hairs on the back of your neck if she found you pressing too hard.

And we’re not ones to do stupid jokes so we will refrain from stating that, it looks like you made an IMPRESSION on the cops and, on good behavior, perhaps you can get your record WIPED clean but, right now, you’re kind of in a pile of CRAP. Where in the world did you learn that write-on-TP trick?  For crissakes, do you know how much I got yelled at, as a kid, for using a half roll of toilet paper because I didn’t want to get a speck of poop on my fingers? My mother would have you water-boarded for wasting toilet paper on a silly robbery note!

Next robbery job—–go steal some photo copy paper from your job or the local library so that you have some legit scratch paper at home, Ya Jagoff!

 

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You can order the Book of Jagoffery, click the pic

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