YaJagoff Potato

What is photo number one?

a) Photo of Pittsburgh’s Gateway Clipper Fleet

b) The 1979 World Champion Pittsburgh Pirates

c) A Toilet

d) All of the above

(Hang in there with me, it gets tougher.)

What is photo number two?

a) Photo of Pittsburgh’s Gateway Clipper Fleet

b) The 1979 World Champion Pittsburgh Pirates

c) A pile of potatoes in a grocery store

d) All of the above

CLEARLY, the answer is C because.. well, the answer is always C.  Also, clearly one of these is meant for urinating and one is NOT… especially when is sitting out in public next to other veggies and salad dressings!

(I am currently singing that Sesame Street song, “One of these things is not like the other, one of these things just doesn’t belong.” )

So here’s the story from the WPXI: A nameless young-adult female, allegedly urinated on a display of potatoes the other evening, (photo #2 above), and then walked right out of the local WalMart after finishing her “tagging” duties…..like a dog.

My dear Ursula the Urinator, life is gonna get even MORE challenging when you turn 21 an actually start to drink regularly – which will cause you to make some regrettable decisions.  The only way to avoid those future traps is to get in to good habits NOW of OBEYING RULES AND BOUNDARIES…ya know, manners, respect for property, etc. etc.  So the next time ya see a pile of taters, or ANYTHING, in a grocery store, you might want to respect that someone put them there TO SELL and give yourself the benefit of the doubt that it WAS NOT PUT THERE just because someone like grocery display decorator thought it would look nice!

One other note we purposefully did not print your name here because every older-adult has done something stupid like this and we are all thankful that there were no smart phones/internet to review my simple quiz above just in case you take a trip, in the future, with your friends to another grocery store with an empty stomach and a full bladder, YA JAGOFF!!!!

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