You call home. You say, “I’m stopping at the grocery store for some chips and some Q-tips. I’ll be home in 10 minutes!”

4 hours later, you’re still in the grocery store trying to find the Q-tips which aren’t were they were 7 days ago when you were in this same grocery store last week. You just wanted to be home RELAXING!!

Oh…hmmmm…. but for some unknown reason, I guess because they go together for breakfast, bananas are hanging in the cereal aisle. But why has the chili mix been moved to the Mexican food section vs. just staying in that swanky McCormick hillside-condominium-like thing for spices from A to Z that looks like those expensive apartments on the side of Mount Washington.

Oh.. Q-tips? They are in the face make-up aisle now. I’m not sure why they were ever placed near the tooth brushes…. I mean personal disposable toiletry thingies seems like a good category but…why are Q-tips typecast into make-up use? Sure, I know that you’re not supposed to put anything bigger than your elbow in your ear but, hells-bells, there are certainly more uses for Q-tips than just make-up removal. They’d be better off by the bags of ice! Everyone needs ’em!

Oh.. and batteries are hanging in the frozen food aisle. Who doesn’t think, “Oh yeah, I need a package of 9-volts to put my tongue on” as you’re sorting through some assorted frozen Dippin’ Dot packs!

Hey grocery store managers in your sweater vests and rolled up long-sleeves.. the only thing that DOESN’T move around in your stores these days are the banks and the coin-collection machines! If you’re gonna keep playing the grocery SHELL GAME on me.. or hide the olives, at least provide me some kind aisle map-app so that I can find my CRAP…YaJagoffs!!

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