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Welcome to our regular Saturday feature “What Aggravates Me”

By Comedian John Knight

Ok, let me admit that this column was originally intended to be about how people gave up on the Penguins after game five before they even lost game six. So, I’m as guilty as the rest of you who gave up on them. There were a lot of negative posts on social media. One friend of mine said he couldn’t watch the debacle that would happen in game six. After game seven he was praising Lord Stanley as if his previous post had never happened.

Why do we do this? Do we try not to get our hopes up so high? Are we using reverse psychology? Or are we just so damn spoiled by having championship teams that nothing short of perfection will do?

I was performing in Cleveland last weekend. None of their professional sports teams has won a championship since 1964. Since that time The Pirates have won two World Series, The Penguins have won three Stanley Cups with a chance to add a fourth and the Steelers have won six Super Bowls.

The last title Cleveland had was the Browns winning the NFL championship. It wasn’t the Super Bowl. There were no big halftime shows or Dorito’s commercials. If you watched on television it was in black and white. Hell, if you went to the actual game is was in black and white. It was so long ago that life wasn’t colorized yet.

What I found when I was in Cleveland was a lot of excitement about the Cavaliers. The people there really believe this is the year the string will be broken and The Cav’s will win the championship. I didn’t encounter a single person saying,

“Nah, they’ll find a way to lose like they always do.”

Maybe because they’re not spoiled. It could be because their idiots.

There are people in Cleveland who resent the success our sports teams have had here in Pittsburgh. I had a guy sitting down front at one of the shows wearing a “Puck Pittsburgh” shirt. It really makes no sense because Cleveland doesn’t have a hockey team.

Yeah, I know it’s just a play on words and he said he wore it in my honor. That’s what he said when I asked him about it anyway. You would hate to think it was just a weird coincidence. You know, he was going to have a big night in the city. Maybe grab some dinner and then go to the show. When he was getting dressed and had to make that important wardrobe selection, he said,

“Let’s go with the “Puck Pittsburgh” shirt.”

The point I’m trying to make is this guy is a real fan. In fifty years of Super Bowls, the Browns have never gone unless they bought tickets. Yet, this guy is still a fan. That’s what true fans do, keep believing.

Baseball has always been my favorite sport. When the Pirates were horrible for twenty straight years, do you think I stopped following them? Damn right I did. I wasn’t wasting my time on that bunch of losers. Anything else would have been sheer lunacy. Next thing you know, I’m going out on Saturday night wearing a “Cluck Cleveland” shirt. I jumped back on that bandwagon about five years ago.

Those of us who gave up after the Penguins blew game five should be ashamed. We should know better. There’s no way they were going to lose to a team from Florida. Florida shouldn’t even have hockey. All we did was give ourselves unnecessary stress…which I live for, by the way.

So, let’s believe. Don’t get down on the Penguins if they lose a game or two. It’s not over until they raise the cup over their head for the fourth time. Even if they don’t win it’s been a great season hasn’t it? Yeah, I know…I’m not buying that either.

Follow John on Twitter @jknight841

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