Do you know why the Pen’s loss to the Rangers last night really, really sucked?
Because I was out of town… behind enemy lines… deep into North Western Ohio. My hotel barely had reliable internet so I wasn’t shocked to discover that they did not have the NBC Sports Channel. So I found a bar called Frickers. Not a bad place. Food is decent. Beer is cold and the TV screens, at least the main 3, are huge.
So there I was… at the bar.. sitting in front of the one 3 big TVs that the Pens game on. The other two had the Chicago Bulls game and the Detroit Tigers game (Northwest Ohio is more Detroit fans than Cleveland fans).
I nestled in with a beer and ordered the cheapest thing on the menu…. chips and salsa. I made that last until the end of the first period.
Just then, some Cleveland-ite approaches the bartender and requests, on behalf of her table, to have the hockey game taken off so that her group can watch the Indians game. I looked straight at that bartender as if I as Max Lapierre staring down Marc Staal. Game on.
Well, unlike the Pens, I pulled out all of the stops. I ordered more food than I needed over the next 2 periods to show my support for keeping the Pens game on. Cheese sticks, more beer, boneless chicken wings… you name it… I ordered it. The problem, is I showed up..put my mouth where my money was and the Pens… well…. they DIDN’T show up.. until the third period.
Hey Pens…I sure hope you show up with heart and passion for game 4 because, not only did that bar seat cost me a fortune in $$ to sit there for 3 periods (2 of which you didn’t show up)… but I’m fairly certain I’m gonna need a heart catheterization from all the unnecessary fried food I ate on your behalf, Ya Jagoffs!
I love these stories. It’s like, everyone was sitting around, drinking and saying to each other, “Ya know what would make us a bunch of money fast?” And then they down a few more “bravery beers” and go to it! But…. they forget to plan what the next step might be…. like… “Where do we hide or sell 10, 10-foot aluminum rails?” (especially since they are now mentioned on the news and in the Trib)
Now one might say, “Hey, they’re probably doing it for the metal exchange rate!” Yeah, I get that but, my question is HOW…. as in how in theeeeeeee hell does someone conceal these things and shop them around.
Maybe they use them as stilts?
(Hey, buddy, pssssst, over here, pssssst, guess what’s under my coat and you can have it for only fie-dolla!”)
Wait…. maybe I misjudged ya! Maybe you took those rails home to paint them with black and gold Rustoleum to help out the Army Corp of Engineers and plan on bringing them back to install them as RiverWatch volunteers! If so…ahhhhh.. nevermind.
Well “rowdy railer reapers,” good luck hiding the rails under your mattress…or…hanging out in downtown Pittsburgh yelling, “Who needs 2…aluminium rails? I got parking passes too!”
This may be a little premature but…. good luck in jail, YA JAGOFFS!!!!
We are yakkin with James Gersten, President of BR Guest and Bills Bar and Burger Executive Chef, Ivy Stark.
Bills Bar and Burger is now in Pittsburgh at the Westin Convention Center in downtown Pittsburgh.
Bill’s officially opens to the public, April 22nd.
Special thanks to Markowitz Communications for the invitation to meet the Bill’s Bar and Burger gang, hang out there for two days and go home feeling like I’m so full that I won’t need to purchase groceries for the next week.