Ohhhhhh, THIS is Uncomfortable

YJ-Bonner

 

In basketball terms, this is called an “alleyoop.”  Someone tosses the ball up at the basketball rim and you jump up and SLAM that MUTHA home!

Click  here (WPXI) if you want the full story, including WPXI’s Cara Sapida awesomely delivering the line, “…is not getting the boyfriend of the year award..” Haaaaa..I just KNEW it was going to be good hearing that.

There was huuuuuuge excitement In the Jagoff News room at that point.  I literally stood up and yelled over to the JBND (Jagoff Breaking News Desk), “Listen up.  This is what we live for!”

Here is a summary of the Joshua Tale:

This guy Joshua and his girlfriend ALLEGEDLY stole DVDs from the Bridgeville Right Aid.

Working as a team, they have done this more than once ALLEGEDLY.

Upon escaping this time, Josh decides to leave his Honey-Bunny behind and take off in the get-away car his Honey-Bunny was supposed to be driving.

She now has no ride and thus sings BETTER than a canary.. more like Jeff Jimmerson at a Penguins game in front of 400,000 fans.  (Including where exactly to find Josh.)

This is no longer a Who-Dunnit!

In war there is no substitute for victory said Douglas MacArthur.  And in OUR war on people trying to make the rest of us Pittsburghers look bad, there is no substitute for STOOOOOOOOOOOPIDITY!!!

Josh, buddy… what were you thinking???  You ticked off your girlfriend big guy…like  left her served up on a platter to the police.

Wow… there’s literally nothing in the “Guy Manual” for handling this one.  You’re own your own!  Have never heard of the ol’ “Hell hath no scorn like a woman-ALLEGELDY-left-holding-a-bag-of-stolen-DVDs-who-was-left-behind-at-a-crime-scene-by-her-man?”

Good luck Josh-mosh… ya know, your future would have been a whole lot safer if you would have left your photo I.D. at the crime scene with a note that you were the one who killed Jimmy Hoffa and left an open box of doughnuts and a note taunting the incoming police, Ya Jagoff!

 

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Yakkin’ With Ya Jagoff! – Comedian, Terry Jones

Welcome to our weekly “Yakkin’ With Ya Jagoff!” segment.

We’re yakkin’ with Pittsburgh Comedian Terry Jones about

Being a chubby kid growing up in Garfield and Penn Hills

His first open mic night

Who’s his favorite impression to do?

Being part of the Jim Krenn #NoRestrictions Podcast

Do people stop him at the grocery store and ask him to do impressions?

Click the logo below to  subscribe to the #NoRestrictions Podcast


Click here for the Team Terry Website

 

THANKS TO:

For being AWESOME hosts!!!

THANKS TO:

For the production!

Don’t forget to subscribe to our Ya Jagoff  YouTube Channel.

If you need to get caught up, here are some previous episodes (Click the Pics to watch)

And They Wonder Why We Stop At The Tunnel…

Who HASN’T made fun of the drivers that drive 60mph up to the entrance of the Squirrel Hill tunnel and then suddenly hit their brakes as they enter it?

(The weird thing is, if we all make fun of those drivers, who in the heck ARE those drivers????)

But let’s not digress too far from the photo above.

While 99.091230876% of us are trying to STOP drivers from slowing down at the tunnel entrance, here’s an official sign that says “BE PREPARED TO STOP!”  But that sign, as you can see, is preceded by a “MAINTAIN SPEED THRU TUNNELS” sign….. HUH????? Do I hit the gas or ride the brake????

(Remember that line from the movie Animal House..”Well what the hell we s’posed ta do, ya moron?)

OK… for the sake of argument,  let’s say this makes sense to me and I do as the signs instruct…I maintain my speed through the tunnel but should be prepared to stop.  And WHY should I be prepared to stop?  Because there are even MORE SIGNS TO READ!!!!!

With all this signage how is anyone supposed to pay attention to maintaining their speed when entering the tunnel?  More importantly, with all these signs, how is anyone supposed to concentrate on the song on the radio or Pandora as they enter the tunnel so that, when the signal picks back up on the other side of the tunnel, we never missed a beat and are singing in the exact spot that the song is on??????????

All that we know is, no wonder people are afraid to enter the Squirrel Hill Tunnel, the road leading us up to the entrance is basically lined with deck of reading flash cards and the REAL fear is that Sister Anecita, from 4th grade, is on the other side to give us a reading pop quiz, Ya Jagoffs!!!

Thanks to @HondaZombie for being our Honorary Jagoff Catcher today.

Don’t Forget To Order Your T-shirt

Click the pic below to see the store.