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Oct 3 2011

Breast Cancer Awareness Month – AND A Charlotte Parking Jagoff!

It’s October and that means its Breast Cancer Awareness Month.  So we headed to the Charlotte, North Carolina ”Race for the Cure.”  The trip was worthwhile in that we were part of about 18,000 people raising over $1 million for breast cancer research!  Here’s a 3-pic summary of the race:  Picture #1 we marked our territory on Bank of America Stadium, home of the Carolina Panthers.  #2 an obvious HUGE number of spectators that turned out  #3 a campaign sign-holder Jagoff SHAMELESSLY promoting their candidate while most of us are ready to pass out (he’s completely unaware of our shirt).

And now to the parked car at the top.  Shortly after I rounded the corner on Summit Street, there was the Jagoff Holy Grail, something that just made this a “business trip,” – a person that took about .000084 seconds to park their car.  Because pointing out Jagoffs is our civic duty and not just a hobby,  I broke off of my blazing 13-minute mile pace to stop, turn around, and take the pic (the guy running right behind me with a stroller was none too happy with my quick-stop-photo-op.  If he submits me as a 5K Jagoff, we would be obligated to make the post but I doubt he knows what a Jagoff is!)

Maybe this Charlotte-Parker had a good excuse for the back of their car being almost 3 feet from the curb — like, maybe they were coming home from a late night binge, suddenly saw thousands of people running at them and freaked out and quickly ditched into the first spot they saw.  Or maybe they actually had a side-car attached to the vehicle when they parked and then someone stoll the sidecar!! (See, we give everyone the benefit of doubt.)

Back to this being the start of Breast Cancer Awareness Month - we have THIS to say:  Pittsburgh’s Race For The Cure gets about 30,000 people on Mother’s Day (be sure you regsiter) and breast cancer now has a greater than 90% survival rate sooooooooo, HEY BREAST CANCER, we’re closing in on you, YA JAGOFF!!!

 

NOTE: Thanks to all in Charlotte – Family, event organizers, spectators, sponsors AND ESPECIALLY the Parking Jagoff on Summit for making the trip worthwhile!!!

 

Don’t forget that we sell our “Don’t Be A Jagoff” T-shirts to benefit breast cancer research.  Click on my Celebration Tag below to order.

 

MAKE SURE YOU HIT SHARE BELOW TO MAKE EVERYONE AWARE OF BREAST CANCER AWARENESS MONTH!!!

 

 

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Oct 1 2011

Quotes On The Bus Week 4

Every Saturday this spot is dedicated to things overheard on one of the Port Authority buses of Allegheny County.  Thanks to the AWESOME Michael Nac, creator of QUOTES ON THE BUS for his posts each week!

 

“My cats lick my toes until I kick’em in the face and tell’em Get the Hell away.” – G2, Carson Street

Follow Quotes on the Bus on Facebook HERE and/or Twitter HERE

If you want to contribute your own quote overheard on a bus, send to michaelcnac@gmail.com.

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Sep 30 2011

“Everybody Must Get StonePeppered” OR Yelled At By The Manager “Evad”

 

To be clear, we are not hear to be food critics or make scud-like attacks on Pittsburgh things or people.  On the other hand, when people really do act like… well, YOU KNOW, then, we have to let folks know because we LOVE Pittsburgh and we hate when people make the rest of us look bad.

We received an email (sender remaining anonymous for good reason) about a recent dining experience at the Settler’s Ridge restaurant called, StonePepper Grill.  Their motto is, “Everybody Must Get StonePeppered!”  We will not say when the visit was, other than it was approximately September, 26th around 7pm or so.  And we will NOT mention the manager’s name (who is the subject of this post) so let’s call him EVAD (quite possibly the reverse of what was on his name tag).

Here’s a piece of the email we received: (we have inserted filters for the swear words)

The manager there is the most unprofessional, slovenly, rude and inappropriate piece of (things that flies hover around)  I’ve ever had the displeasure of seeing. His stained t-shirt is probably NOT the dress code. I watched him grab an 18 year old employee’s (substitute another word for DONKEY). I heard him say he was going to “punch the cook in the mother-(think of a word that USUALLY comes out when a little boy tries to say the word TRUCKING) face.”

The email goes on to talk about the manager, who we don’t want to name (but apparently has red-ish hair and and should probably eat a few more redishes and less bread and fries) on how he taunted this particular customer about her wanting to take him home!

To be fair, back in July, there was a pretty favorable write-up about the StonePepper Grill in Robinson raving about the food and the restaurant itself (click here).

On the other hand, when ya have a guy like Dave, oops, I mean EVAD running the shop, ya gotta wonder how long it’s going to be before the restaurant becomes the next “Store It Yourself” warehouse!

You may think that we want you to boycott the StonePepper Grill at Settler’s Ridge, but NAY, NAY!  We suggest something completely different….if you get a chance, go there.  Call ahead to see if our man EVAD is working.  Then, work your way into a situation where you have to talk to the manager (him).  At that point, let’s see if we can get him so fired up that he CRACKS in front of everyone!!!  (Feel free to mention that his shirt is stained more than Fred Flintstones!)

In the meantime, to the StonePepper gang, ya might be better off with Stone Cold Steve Austin as opposed to “EVAD THE GOLIATH” as a manager for your place in Robinson.  It actually might be GREAT for business if you print EVAD some business cards with HIS name on them and the name of one of your competitor restaurants!!!

And EVAD, we’re thinking that you should have spent the extra money to go to the Disney Customer Training as opposed to the Lucky’s Bar and Radiator Shop class you probably took, Ya Jagoff!!

 

NOTE:  While this Jagoff tip was anonymous, we had more than enough detail from various emails to assure that this is not some secret scud attack!  Go see EVAD yourself and let us know!  The first person to email us a photo of themselves WITH EVAD and you in your “Don’t Be A Jagoff” t-shirt, will get a $25 iTunes Gift Card! (YaJagoff@comcast.net)  And remember to be nice about it!!!  Don’t become a jagoff yourself!

 

 

 

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Sep 29 2011

The News Is Coming! “Honey, Where’s My Favorite Shirt?”

Here’s another week where we are posting all 5 days!!!  But NO WORRIES, keep your submissions coming to yaJagoff@comcast.net.

So unless your part of an early morning raid or a sudden emergency, me thinks that the news folks call you up and ask if they can come and talk to you.  Once you agree, they probably give you an approximate time when they will show up to PUT YOU ON CAMERA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you don’t know this story, CLICK HERE, but basically, Joe Russell and his honey-bun had a wedding planned.  He lost his job, the mother-in-law lost her deposit on the wedding hall, on and on, and on.  And, like MOST of young-and-in-love couples who fall on hard times early in their marriage, they planned a few date-nights TO CLIMB TELEPHONE POLES AND STEAL COPPER WIRE!!!!!!

(By the way, they got $18 for their copper efforts.)

But whatever, whatever, cuz, the day the news crew shows up to get a statement from Joe, he seems to not be able to find a shirt, not even a DIRTY ONE crumpled in the bottom of a hamper!  Oh, and he can’t find a comb either.  Now, we’re not only forced to hear his hard-luck excuse, but we’re forced to watch those 12 hairs in the middle of his chest, dance in the wind WHILE he tells the story.    (Thank God she didn’t ask him to do jumping jacks!)

Hey, we’re no “Ken Dolls” but, if the news showed up at the Ya Jagoff World Headquarters, I gotta tell ya, I wouldn’t even answer the door until I put on one of my nicer Penguins golf shirts and a Steelers ball cap!

Joe, the news pic of you and the Mrs. coming out of the church all dressed up and married is AWESOME.  Unfortunately, that mental image was washed away out of our minds when we were flushing our eyeballs out with rubbing alcohol after seeing you shirtless on the news.  Maybe the crime you SHOULD have committed was STEALING YOUR WEDDING TUX so you had some clothes for your 15-minutes of fame.

As our Jagoff Catcher for this story said when he emailed us, “How about the next time you’re interviewed on TV, you put a shirt on, Ya Jagoff!”

By the way, here’s an EARLIER Jagoff post of a guy who OVERDRESSED for the news (Click the Photo)

And DON’T forget to order your “Don’t Be A Jagoff” T-shirt, we’re really close to our $1,000 donation to Breast Cancer Research (Click Photo)

Thanks to Honorary Jagoff Catcher, Twitter Follwer and Facbook follower Dan Casciato for bringing this to our attention!

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Sep 28 2011

A “Jagoff Sandwich” On My Way To a Smoothie!

Seriously, if this parking epidemic keeps up, we’re gonna ask West Penn AAA to stop handing out TripTiks and start handing out “Parking T-Squares and Protractors!”  Parking in between two parallel lines MIGHT actually be the most frequent post here.  (Even more posts than we have about NFL Commissioner Roger Go-Ta-Hell.)

The car on the left was in the Einstein Bagels lot in Greentree.  And if ya know the location, you know that there about 12 parking spaces in the whole lot – parking there is more of a premium than a Pirates’ winning season.  But, that made no difference to the lady (yes it was a lady) when she spun the family big-rig into that spot.  (Hey, as long as SHE had a spot, who cares!)

The pic on the right is in the Shadyside parking garage.  Our VERY FIRST, “Jagoff Sandwich” as TJ, our web guy, called it.  Two drivers that went to the same parking school.  Or, even worse, two drivers that don’t care about anyone else but themselves.  It may not look like it, but, I verified, you could NOT get a car in between those two and still get out of your car without using the sunroof as an escape hatch.

At this point, you may be asking yourself, “He Ya Jagoff, why were YOU hanging out in Shadyside anyway?” Well, there was a taste-testing at, Planet Smoothie-Pittsburgh.  I gotta tell ya, I was SOLD after the first sip!!!  We tasted 6 smoothies.  ALL were good, like “touching that special spot in your ear with a Q-tip making your eyes cross” good.  My favorites were the Chocolate Elvis (Cocoa, Peanut Buter, Bananas, Yogurt and an energy blast) and the Acai (Acai, apple, strawberries, bananas).

I know what our “Iron-City-Chips-Wings-and-Cheeseball” invibing followers are gonna say about us drinking smoothies.  To that we poo-poo you and say, “quit yer yappin’ until ya try one, Ya… well, YOU know that drill!”

Back to parking….if you look in the right column under DRIVING  or PARKING LOT JAGOFFS, you will see that we have offered many solutions including “bowling lane bumpers” for the parking impaired but, we think this isn’t really a matter of not KNOWING how to park.  It’s more of a “NOT CARING” how to park thing.

So to all you Peter-Parkers that don’t care about taking two parking spots, here’s what we are proposing to the Parking Gods – hire some of the guys that manage those North Side parking lots during Steelers games to work THESE lots during the week.  Ya know, those guys that charge $45 CASH for every spot you take?  We guarantee that will teach ya how to park in ONLY one spot because, at THAT rate, EVERYONE figures out how to squeeze their Winnebago-and-trailer-tailgate-wagon into a spot the size of a Smart Car, Ya Jagoffs!

 

Go LIKE the Planet Smoothie Pittsburgh Facebook page by clicking the Now Open sign!! 

 Or just go visit: 5608 Walnut Street, Pittsburgh, PA 15232

 

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