Drunk Jagoffs

Jagoffery In Vegas DID NOT Stay in Vegas!

It has been some time since we had a Drunk Jagoff“ to post and this one comes all the way from Las Vegas.

It seems like “Blue T-shirt Man” (which is really different than the Blue Man Group) stumbles across a couple of guys in a doorway.

Does he pass them by?  No!

Does he see them urinating in public and say, “Hey, whadda ya doing?  You could get fined for that!” NO!

What he DOES do is, he decides that HE has to break-the-seal too and waits in line for the “wall urinal” which is not really a wall urinal at all… it’s JUST A WALL!  But more than that, he stands close enough to get the first guy’s urine all over the bottom of his shoes!!!

(You should let your kids read this so that they understand the concept of NEVER putting their shoes on the kitchen table or on the furniture.)

Hey boys, the funny thing is, you guys are peeing on the side of a humongous casino in Downtown Vegas which, according to most of the brochures has 3,201 slot machines and 327 BATHROOMS on the inside!!!!   And by the way, after you get done emptying those bladders in the bathrooms INSIDE THE CASINO, the staff are more than happy to give you free drinks to refill those bladders!!!!

Sorry to say that, thanks to social media, what happens in Vegas DOESN’T stay in Vegas.  And here’s our little Urine-alysis of this situation:   You both should stop drinking… it can make you broke and stupid.

Case in point, when you’re drunk, you don’t realize that urine being pee’d on a wall banks off of that wall and runs back at ya…. all over the soles of your shoes and that’s really gonna suck when you pack those shoes next to your toothbrush in your carry-on bag to fly home, Ya Jagoffs!!!!

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St. Paddy’s Day Parade Jag

 

YJ-Parade

(EVERYONE SING)

“…and when Iiiiirish eeeeeeeyes are smiiiiiiiiiling.

Sure they’ll steeeeeal your heart…. awaaaaaaaay!  

Yeah.. I understand that the photo above is a little…um… GROSS and DISGUSTING but, when these things happen, like a car crash or 90-year old cleavage, despite how bad it is, ya still have to look.. or take picture of it on your phone!

To this lady, the internet is teaching you a lesson through a newly approved Behavioral Change Methodology Phone App called, TPE (Total Public Embarrassment).

Suggestion: the next time you spend your hard earned money for your green shirt, socks, earrings, beads, parade-day-eve drinks, breakfast the day of the parade and get a second-mortgage that it takes to pay to park downtown on an event like the St. Paddy’s Day Parade, say “no” to that SECOND glass of beer, YA JAGOFF!

Note: To this point, there is no admission on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram as to who gets the photo credit!

Just Another Day In Oakland


Ok.. let’s just keep this simple because you can CLEARLY see what is happening here.  Yes, as if Oakland traffic around the University of Pittsburgh needs another excuse for traffic jams other than the 1,021,021 buses that stop to pick up riders just as the intersection lights turn green!

Now THIS guy has to feel important and pull into an intersection on a Yellow Light and… well… who would have ever thought… the Yellow Light turned  to a Red Light on him!!!!  Whooda thunk?????  Now he’s just left sitting there…. right in the middle of, well, EVERYONE!

Hey Tahoe-Terry….. nice work!  No man is an island, BUT, when you have a complete lack of respect for traffic and traffic lights, some men become, well.. you know where we are headed with this dontcha????

FYI, Tahoe-Terry, the 39 seconds it takes to sit at an Oakland Red Light plus, maybe, another 6 seconds for the Yellow Light has got to be a better gig than the horns, dirty looks and fingers you received from the oncoming drivers.  And by the way, be sure that, when you get to your destination in Oakland, that you DON’T pull off to a parking area, make sure that you pull just to the right of the road causing even MORE traffic jams due to your complete lack of consideration for others, Ya Jagoff!!!

 

 

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