Bank Jagoffs



Remember when you were little, and your parents said they would give you until “5″ to listen to them?  Then, they didn’t really want to punish you so they would do…. 6…..7…..7 and 1/2, 7 and 3/4……………

Well, it seems we have THAT parent mentality setting speed limits at the PNC Bank in Chippewa, Beaver County!!!!!!!!!!!!  Here’s the message that came with the pic….

Seriously?  I saw a car doing 7 and 3/4… WHERE’S THE JUSTICE???????

Haaaaaaa… seriously?   It’s half of  School Zone speed limit!  Looked on my car speedometer….. no 7 1/2 availble!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Not sure WHAT to say about this one… ok… never mind.. of COURSE I have something to say about this.  At least the speed limit is still higher than the Christmas Card interest rate!!!

Well, PNC, let it be 7 1/2 mph at the Chippewa office……………………..good sign.. made us laugh…the FUNNIEST thing is that someone actually legitimately MADE this sign for you!!!!  This ain’t none of that Kids-spray-paint-over-the-3-in-35-to-make-drivers-thing-the-speed-limit-is-85 thingies!!!

But while we are talking BANK SIGNS with PNC, we would REALLY appreciate if you could just do away with those signs that say NEXT TELLER  that suddenly go up EVERY LUNCH TIME when……. well…. when I am at the bank on my lunch hour trying to cash a check?  Does the entire staff have to take lunch when I take MY lunch specifally to  make a transaction at the bank, Ya Jagoffs???

Thanks to Facebook Follower Richard Schneeman for the pic and for being our Honorary Jagoff Catcher today.


Click the pic to see how to order yours!!!

Failed Bank Customer Service 101 – Parkvale/FNB

For a previous post on bad car dealer customer service, click here.   But today’s is another goodie.

This is kind of like a guest blog, cuz one of our followers pretty much wrote the whole thing.

For those of you who don’t know, Parkvale Bank was recently taken over by First National Bank. The process of working with and gaining the trust of all the old Parkvale customers is going just GREAT (cue sarcastic eye).

For example, if you try to access your account online, you can only see your account history since FNB took over—basically ALMOST a month (real helpful if you’re a day trader but I’m not).

When FNB took over in the middle of February, they promoted kit glove Customer Service for those ex-Parkvale patriots that were attempting to access their accounts on line for the first time.  Well, here’s how their Noble-Peace-Prize-level of customer service works.

If you call the “Customer Service” number listed on their website, you will get a recording of something along these lines.

“Sorry but we are experiencing a high call volume. We will not be taking messages at this time. Thank you. GOODBYE.”

Goodbye???????????????????????? Come on, not even a “press 2 for Spanish?” Just a simple Adios Amigos. (Oh wait, they DID say Thank You before saying goodbye and hanging up on me.)

So FNB, since you’re kind of in the “numbers” and “math” business, do you think you could have worked a little harder on the X-divided-by-Y-multiplied-by-n-(the number of Parkvale customers) minus zero (the number zero representing the number of customers that might NOT call for help the first 10 days) divided by n squared calculations that you used to determine how many international operators named Bob, Jane and Mikey to put on?

As a final note to the FNB cheap-as-we-can-be-customer-transition gang, just in case you plan on also taking over the Parkvale Balloon, we suggest you NOT try to save money by simply STAPLING an FNB banner over the Parkvale name, Ya Jagoffs!


Thanks to Collin C for being our Honorary Jagoff Catcher today AND for basically doing our job for this post!!

Banking Jagoffs….Our First Post About BANKS!!!

So we headed to the bank yesterday to drain our Christmas Club Savings Account in preparation for Black Friday.   Holy crap, did not realize how much money one could make over 9 months at 2.5% interest.  Thanks to our “investment” in a Christmas Club Savings, we now, not only have our PRINCIPAL to spend, but, thanks to all that interest, we NOW have enough to get a small Orange Julius AND some of those free taste-test cups from the asian cookery in the food court!

The best part of cashing in our Christmas Club Savings Account is, we went during lunch hour – when we had some time to run to the bank.  WOW…does everyone take lunch at the same time every day like this???  But wait, 18 people in line to do some business at the bank on their lunch hour, and, guess WHO ELSE is on their lunch hour???????

THE BANK TELLERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ya know, creating ATM machines to replace bank tellers was just as ingenious as creating EZ Pass for toll roads – ATMs and EZ Pass readers DON’T EAT!!

Hey banks.. we understand the gazillion jokes about holding “banker’s hours.”  On the other hand, do you not have some kind of customer survey or film from those bank-robber cameras that tells you lots of people come in during lunch???

And maybe you should consider a NEW more practical fee.. yes, a new fee!  A, Let’s-Help-The-Tellers-Make-It-Through-Lunch-Fee.

Maybe, JUST MAYBE, it would be smart use that fee to feed the bank tellers some snacks between 10-10:30am each day.  Maybe like they do in kindergarten, even give the tellers some “sleepy time.” Then, maybe they can actually be AT WORK when the customers need them, Ya Jagoffs!!!!


Be sure to keep your phone cameras ready for Black Friday Jagoffs!!!!!! Post them to our Facebook page or email them to us at

Don’t forget to check out our online auction of autographed “Don’t Be A Jagoff” t-shirts HERE.  We will also be having guest blogs by Scott Paulsen, Casey Shea, SteelerGurl, Boss Steeler Chick, Benstonium, @Evil_DanBylsma and more!!!  The Jagoffery fun starts Thanksgiving Day!!!!